It was a very good day...

Some days are better than others.

We all know that...and today was a good one. Sitting down to a big Easter Table with my family and two dear friends to a meal prepared by all of the adults and some of the kids was a warm experience.

Praying with friends and thanking God for His blessings is an incredible experience when you mean what you say.

Number four says after dinner..."Mom, I have a tummy ache and I know why. My food pocket is full and the food is moving down to my poop zone." OH my...OK, I'm taking anatomy class and, so far at least, there is no organ called "food pocket" and/or "poop zone".

She cracks me up every day!

Had a mama in labor today...but she lives an hour and 15 minutes away. As I am using my friend's car right now (mine was destroyed in an accident last weekend), I couldn't justify going that far or using that much gas when Mentor already had another apprentice there. I had to say no. That is SO hard! I want to get my 25 catches in so I can get my licensure.

Although I don't know why... Insurance reimbursement is a big plus. As is carrying oxygen and drugs legally. So is the respect. The satisfaction of knowing I did what I set out to do.

I like where I'm at right now...But I definitely need to get a handle on the schoolwork. Only one more term to graduate and I HAVE to get a C in both classes. I have to...That's all there is to it. I want to be done.

Off to serve the desserts I made...marbled cheesecake, pumpkin pie, pumpkin roll. And a left over ice cream cake rescued a couple days ago when my freezer gave up the ghost.

Yummmmm...and happy, blessed Easter to all!!

MORNING!

OK, it's a little to early to be that loud. But I actually feel halfway positive this morning.

It's a good thing, I guess.

Feel like i'm getting caught up a little on my homework. Still got bills I can't pay, but HEY, that's my life!

Got woke up early when the Rescue Pager went off just before 6. An energetic LOL was out for her morning walk and fell. Poor dear. She was SOOOoooo embarrassed!
But better to be safe than sorry so we checked her out. Chief and I were the only ones who showed up so we went with it. Two EMT Basics against the world, hoping against hope that things wouldn't go south. Turns out one of our first responders lived right where she fell so we had help on scene. WHEW. She decided she just wanted her friend to drive her to the ER anyway.

Well, kids are stirring. Do have to tell you one funny before I go, though. Last night we were having a sit down dinner together. Was #2's idea ... we don't do it very often. It was nice! ANYWAY, #3 says "WOW, I've got a mosquito bite and it's BIG. Almost feels like a monkey bump." (I don't know if you dealt with those when you were a kid but it's when someone thumps you hard enough with their knuckle to raise a bump on your muscle.)
#4 sits up and looks at her with these HUGE eyes and exclaims "SISTER, WHEN have YOU been feeling a monkey's BUM?!?"
Ok, Ok, it struck me funny. I couldn't talk for about ten minutes, tears streaming down my face. We all had a good giggle over that one!

I'm feeling better!

Not 100%, but better.
Still struggling to catch up on my homework...don't even know if that is a possibility at this point.
Was cleaning my room and found a check for $40 that I had forgotten about so at least I will have gas money to get through the weekend.
Still have to work on the cell ph bill and the electric bill...but Loverboy keeps telling me to trust God; that God will provide for me.

I know he's right. But I have such little faith. I'm still scared, still lonely, still worried.
Why can't I just leave it with God? I know I'm a rotten child. I do not in any way, shape or form deserve rewards. But my kids... Surely God will provide for them.

That's what I'm asking for anyway.

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Number four funny of the day -

She crawls up next to me in bed this morning.
"Mom, were you married to our Father?"
"Yes, Squirrel. For fifteen years. Why?"
"I just wondered. What happened?"
"Well, we got a divorce."
"What's a divorce?"
"When you file a paper with a court and end your marriage."
"WELL, THAT is AGAINST the RULES!"
"oh Really!? what are these "rules"?
"#1. you get to be sixteen and you get a boyfriend.
#2 is you go out for awhile and then you get engaged.
#3 is when you marry them.
#4 is that you always talk nice.
#5 is that when you get mad, you work things out,
and #6 is that you are supposed to stay married forever, usually."

Now. Forever...and usually? I may be a redneck, but don't they call that an oxymoron or something like that?
Other than the age issue, she did have some good points, though. I'm just sayin'...

Randomalities

Dropped numbers 2 and 3 off at the local pool and number four and I went shopping, running errands, just generally having some "girl time".
When we went to pick them up, they were all SWEET and KIND. Let #4 sit in the FRONT. Held the car door for her.
All of a sudden she stops, plants her hands on her hips and announces "WHO are YOU and what have you DONE with #2?!??"

TOO funny. But she's right. It was WAaaaay out of character for those middle two!

--------------------------------------------------
Did I somehow forget to mention that I got a ticket.
Speeding ticket.
STOP LAUGHING!! We're going to just work off the assumption that I'm a law abiding citizen.

except for That OoooooNNNNNEEE little thing.
Pedis Leadis.

Of course, I got nailed on the OTHER side of the state. Argh!
By a state police trooper when I had an interview with the State police TODAY.
Dern.
Like I can afford that! Where's that rubber wall when I need something to bang my head against.

-------------------------------------------------------------
#4 again. "Mom, I gotta go potty"

"Uhhh, MOM, I gotta go POTTY!!"

Five more minutes dear.

5 minutes go by.

"Hmmm, Mom, did you know you just drove down an exit?"

No, Squirt!! Are you SERIOUS?!?! I didn't know! AH CRUD...What am I gonna do NOW.
of course I knew. It was potty time. But just the way she said it...Guess you had to be there.

----------------------------------------------------------
#3 comes out for a hug while LB and I are walking the dogs. BIG squeeze.

She heads back toward the house and then turns.
Points her head at my Love and says...

"You know, if you and my mom ever break up, you ain't NEVER gonna find ANYONE like her. All the others will just drink and drink and drink and drink and drink. They'll be NO good for ya'!"

Well...that was totally random! But she got it off her chest...

Gotta go to bed, friends. Catch ya' Manana

Kid funnies

Number three says "Mom, what are hazelnuts?"

"just a type of nut, honey. They grow on trees".
"So were are the hazelnut tree seeds?
"ummm, I think the hazelnut IS the seed!"

"Wow! Can I eat the nut and leave the 'hazel'?"

No, sweety...I think they are pretty much stuck together.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Mom, remember those crayons I got at the restaurant last night?"

"Yes." hear the apprehension in the mother's voice...

"Well...I'm making them naked."

Crayon wrappers all over the floor of the van...yah.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Mom, so do you like Butterflies?"

"They are pretty enough, but they are STILL BUGS..so I'm not real crazy about them."

Hands on hips, huff and an eye roll for effect.

"Good Grief, Mother! Butterflies are the most UNHARMLESS bugs there are!"

I'm serious. That's what she said!

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OK...if you are sensitive...don't read this one. Just keep in mind it comes from a 15 year old boy.

He can always tell when I am blue or stressed so he asks me if I'm sad.
And I tell him that I am just so, so tired and trying to concentrate.
So his words of wisdom?

"Mom, just remember it takes 44 muscles to frown and only four muscles to put up your middle finger and say "Bite Me!"

I'm sorry. I tried to be serious and scold him...it just wouldn't work!
The nice men in the white jackets will be coming to take away my mommy license any minute now.

you buy your coffee...WHERE?

WOW...
I thought I lived in the smallest town in America.

OK...not quite the SMALLEST...but awful dern close!

That's why it seemed a little odd that this just struck me so funny I laughed until I had to lean against the beverage case in the little multi-roomed, dust-encrusted general store.

Was over visiting my darling sweet amazing handsome LB a couple of weeks ago.
**Whispers - Sowwies, I get carried away. Tee Hee**

We took advantage of his dad home working on a puzzle to run to the local Itty Bitty Country Town Market for soda for the kids and somethin' fer dinner. And..of course...bein' the big city gal that I am, I NEEEEDEEDD a Latte'! Seriously. Badly. But figured, Hey, it is just an Itty Bitty Country Town. So I'll grab a refrigerated-in-a-bottle Starcow SuperCaffiene Mocha with Happy Vitamins and call it good.

As I surreptitiously start lookin' around, LB says "Hunny, Whatcha lookin for?"
I batted my eyelashes and said "civilized coffee, my luv". Although he couldn't understand me very well through gritted teeth and the facial tic that was threatening to become a full body seizure soon if I didn't get some Coffee with a CAPITAL "C".
He drawls "Ya mean, like the drive-thru fancy stuff?... Well, we got that here 'bouts!"
Saliva starts to flow and a wild look glazes my eyes as I screech "REEALLLY?!? But, but, I didn't see one on the drive in!"

Wait for it...this is hilarious.

at least to me...

humor me, here...

He says, "Course not! You wouldn't see it out by the highway. It's in the Hardware store next to the LIQUOR counter."

Then he had to stand there like a gentleman while I giggled, guffawed and staggered around the little grocery store until I caught my breath. Goodness! Look at that RUDE city slicker!
After all, where else would you expect to find a Barista who can sell Jack Daniels? Behind the counter ringing up the hammer sale and throwin in a pound o' nails fer free, of course! Silly me!

Ummm, but she actually did make excellent coffee. I had a 24 oz sugar free toffee Latte' with FOUR SHOTS...yes, four shots, my friends! Add whipped cream, an insulating sleeve and TWO chocolate covered coffee beans and you have one HAPPY mama!

I was very tempted to duck into the insurance agents office to see if I could get a manicure or pop over to the gas station for a home cooked meal and a haircut, but I was running short of time.

This Kid cracks me UP

I swear...she's gonna be a stand up comic when she grows up.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Number four got some play food for her "kitchen" from Santa. She is kind of compulsive so she is arranging it by food group.
She often asks me "Mom, am I the weirdest kid you ever met?"

Ummmm, YAH!

ANYWAY, she starts asking me questions.
Is eggplant a vegetable?
Is celery a vegetable?
are cranberries a fruit?
And we come to the dairy section...
Is Pizza dairy?
Well, no...it's a combination food. Bread, Meat, Cheese (milk) and tomato (fruit).
"well, I'm just going to put it in the Dairy anyway."

WELL, why did you ASK ME THEN? Huff!

"Mom, is Pie dairy?"
"no, definitely not. It's sugar and fat."
"it's dairy!"
"uh, NO! Sugar and fat!"

"DAIRY!"
"SUGAR!"

here it comes...
"THAT does it! I'm calling my lawyers!"

HUH? I'm serious! that's what she said!
Toy cell phone out, open...beep...beep..boop...boop...

"Hello, Lawyers? ... Yes, I'd like to SUE somebody!"

I didn't hang around to see if it was ME. I had to go to my room so I could laugh uncontrollably.

Wanna Be a BEAR!

Number Four Funnies

She comes out of the bedroom with a drawing of a Loooong blue dog. It has a black mask on.
"Mom, guess what kind of dog this is!"
Best educated guess here..."Uhh, I would guess a Dacshund"
Eye rolls..."Mother! It's a ninja Weiner Dog!"
OH, silly me!
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Dog is chasing white cat. Cranky white cat. Yappin' little ankle biter dog.
Cat starts hawkin'. YOU KNOW...like a hairball is about to make it's presence known on my dining room floor.

EWWWWWWWWWWWW.
Girls are running and screetching. "Get the cat, Get the Cat!"
"Quick, catch her, get her out of the house before she hurls!"
Number four is dancing in the middle of the living room waving her arms, caught up in the excitement.
She contributes to the hollering in her own special number four way...

"FIRE IN THE HOLE!! FIRE IN THE HOLE!! FIRE IN THE HOLE!!"

Where in the WORLD does she come up with that?
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Little boy is antagonizing her at school.
There's only ten children in the entire grade school, so it's not like she can get away from him.
Mr. Teacher tries his best, but Little Boy still gets her once in awhile...
like yesterday.

She gets in the van.
The door is closed and she is quiet for a minute. Then...
"Mom, today, I called that mean Little Boy a name."
Well, like any mother, I cringe, waiting for Mr. Teacher to come striding across the parking lot to report what horrible foul name my six year old has blurted out at school in her frustration. You can only imagine what what I was imagining as I carefully asked, "Well, dear, what name was that?"

"I told that Little Boy he was a Mister McTurdsalot!"

Does she get this stuff from TV?

Like a fine wine, we get better as we age

I don't know how many of you have seen this essay come through your email inbox. Or, like me, Five or thirty TIMES. If you have seen it, I apologize, but I just have to post it. Too many good points!
It is credited to Andy Rooney...I vaguely remember him. He seemed like a pretty smart guy when he was on the news. Then when I read this...I KNEW he was a smart guy. I just kinda chuckled under my breath because I remember how I was when I was younger. I have DEFINITELY mellowed with age. Or...maybe I have just realized that age and treachery will overcome youth and enthusiasm ANY day.

ENJOY...


"As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

• A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, 'What are you thinking?' She doesn't care what you think.
• If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does somethin g she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting.
• Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.
• Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.
• Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40.
• Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.
• Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk, if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smar t, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.

Ladies, I apologize. "

Handcuff me to the passenger's door...

I want to start this story off with a disclaimer... I adore my ex-FIL! He has a heart of gold and is the sweetest thing. For purposes of this story, I'm gonna blog-name him Fred.

Took the kids up to visit Fred and Flossie, their father's relatives. It's about a 3 hour drive, not counting potty stops. They had a great time and two of them decided to stay for a week. Gramma was gonna take 'em to the rodeo, cousins were there....irresistible to 50% of Children, ya' know.

Well, the subject of visitation came up and I offered to take Fred to visit the ex in his long-term armored residence. So we spent the night and got up at the crack of dawn properly fortified with water bottles and BIG cups o'coffee.
As we are climbing into the Crown Vic, Fred "happens to mention" the fact that he has "molar degeneration" and begins to describe the symptoms. For those of you who don't speak Fred-ese, he's talking about Macular Degeneration, an eye condition that severely impairs the vision of those affected. Did I mention that he already has nerve damage in one eye? Here's when I begin to get a little nervous...

After a quick trip through Mickey D's for a treat that Flossie would NEVER let him have for health concerns, we take off. Down the Highway. In a style best described as "meandering". Speed limit is 65. So the cruise control is set on...64 1/2. Which, if you know ME, You know that this will make me CERTIFIABLY INSANE. I'm more of a "Push the limits 75 1/2" type person. But I take a deep breath...I can handle this! I can handle this! Ooooohhhm, Oooohhhm.

Truck speed limit is 55 in our state, which means that we passed ALOT of trucks...but no cars. Unfortunately, one of Fred's "health concerns" that cause him to be banned from Fast food, sugar, starch and anything that contains even one micron of salt, also causes him to take advantage of EVERY... SINGLE... REST... STOP on the two hour drive. So we passed the same trucks at least eight times. I got to know some of those truck drivers on a first name basis...

Let me explain the "meandering"style of driving for those of you who have never experienced this adrenaline-inducing phenomena from a passengers' seat. I noticed fairly soon in the trip that every once in awhile, the drivers' side of the car would just slightly converge with the "fast lane" cars on the left. Now, normally, that would not be a problem, especially if one is planning on actually MOVING INTO that lane. Or if I was driving and going the same SPEED as the cars in the left lane. Neither of which was true in this case. By the end of the trip, I had a mediocre case of SIDEWAYS whiplash from jerking back into the slow lane (once he had realized he was drifting) and I am pretty sure I saw most of my LIFE FLASH BEFORE MY EYES when he unfortunately timed a "drift" into the middle of a motorcycle gang flying colors. They also flew the traditional "one-finger wave" at us...several times.

Again, let me say that I LOVE FRED. He doesn't mean to be socially challenged...he just is. He was a nerd before being a nerd was cool. He starts telling stories of his life and you might as well settle in with a good book, because, BABE, you're gonna be there awhile! His jokes are NOT funny...but we laugh, because we love him and don't want to hurt his feelings. He pretends to be angry and gruff in a teasing manner and NO ONE can tell he is teasing.

WHICH leads to the next fun episode of the day. He decides he wants to find this GREAT hamburger place he went to one time for lunch. Problem is, he wasn't driving on that trip. And he can't see well. And he doesn't remember the name of the place. Soooooo we drive around CowTown for awhile looking.
I'm trying to be helpful, but we're not working with an abundance of information here. Just "Good food and LOTS of it for only seven Bucks!". Hmmmm, OK.
So we go to turn and there are two 'tweens waiting to cross the street. He slams on the brakes in the middle of the intersection to let them go...which is nice albeit HAZARDOUS. But then he rolls down his window and YELLS AT THEM TO "hurry the heckUP! Move your BUTTS!". So one of them turns around and again with the one-finger-wave. You know, I thought he was serious, so I can understand how THEY thought he was serious. He hollers "That's RIGHT! And I deserve it! Cuz I'm a Cranky Old Man!" and he drives off...chuckling to himself. He thought it was a joke! He doesn't realize those kids think he is the rudest thing on the planet and I'm so mortified I'm considering getting out on the next corner and hitching a ride home with the nearest truck driver.
I probably know him anyway after passing him 10 times on the way over!

And then, the visit. It was hard. Something about medium security state prison facilities that give me the willies, you know. Must be all that razor wire...
Dad can't walk well, so we are shuffling behind our visiting group. I'm trying to hang back and "bridge the gap" but the guard is standing at the door tapping his foot and looking at his watch.
We make it to the visit room and sit down with the Ex. He looks good, lost about 150 lbs since I've seen him last. Mainly because all he does is exercise. What else is there to do in there?
Anyway, Fred starts talking. Two hours later, he stops to take a breath.
Then he says "I'm sorry, I'm monopolizing the conversation. You go ahead!"
"No, that's ok, Fred. You have right at it..." After all, what do you say to his son, someone who brought my life to ground ZERO, stomped my heart into the ground and scarred my children for life? There are no words to describe how I feel. See my point?
So Fred and Ex start talking about Math. I don't remember how... But I do remember they were discussing borrowing while subtracting fractions. SETS of objects. I'm serious...they were talking about SETS. Say "SETS" really loud...right now. Go ahead...I'll wait.
Do you see where this is headed?

Fred leans back in his uncomfortable plastic chair, puts his hands behind his head and announces VERY LOUDLY, "WEll, Let's just take a look at the origin of the word "SETS", shall we?"
Dead quiet in the visiting room. Every head turns. My eyes bug out of their sockets. Ex's mouth drops open. Fred doesn't even notice.
After another second or two, the crowd discovers that the subject is NOT what they thought they heard (e.g. SE*X) and they go back to their own visitors.
I scoop my eyeballs up off my lap and re-engage them...while trying without much success to stifle a case of the giggles. My face is turning red, biting my bottom lip hoping the pain will keep me from bursting into guffaws. Mouth and nose twisted together to try to hold the laughter in.
Ex just smiles and rolls his eyes with a slight shake of the head. Fred doesn't even realize what has just occurred.

Whew! I'd really hate for him to be embarrassed. Like I was.

By the time I got back to the homestead and picked up the two munchkins who were coming home with me, I felt a little more settled. Mainly because I slept most of the trip back. I didn't want to see the impending carnage and the stress of stomping on an imaginary brake in the passenger's seat kinda wore me out.
On the drive home, I shared some of the horror I'd experienced with my #1 son. He laughed so hard he couldn't breathe. Which is why I decided to tell you the story.
I made #1 Son PROMISE...Cross yer heart and hope ta die type promise...that if I EVER EVER EVER drive like that, he will handcuff me to the passenger door whenever he takes me for a Sunday drive. I don't want to cause him the grey hairs that I suddenly grew on that trip.

And I would hate to have my son run off and join the motorcycle gang that I had just driven into because he was embarrassed of my driving. If he's going to join a motorcycle gang, I want it to be for a GOOD reason...like women, booze and the feel of the wind in his hair.

OKAY! I'M JUST KIDDING ABOUT THAT LAST PART!

Copying some GOOD stuff...

I HAD TO SHARE THIS....mainly cuz it's just TOO darn funny. :D
A wonderful girlfriend sent it to me and, being known for my WIDE streak of sarcasm, I found it sensible. And hilarious. So here you go...some wisdom for the ages.
====================================================================

01. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.

02. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire. BEEN THERE, DONE THAT!

03. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it. Or at least wait until they are on vacation...like I did last week...and then put it back. Do you think they could tell?

04. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted. Found this out very early in my career life...also, if you don't know HOW to do it, chances are you won't HAVE to.

05. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.

06. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

07. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments. Uhhhh, YAH!

08. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes. Yeehaw! Great logic!

09. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is probably not for you. or if you are unlucky...I used to work in an ER before they closed down the local skydiving school. This one poor soul came down in a cow field, landed in a cow patty and, well, the tattoo on his shin will never look the same.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. THAT's where my first ex husband is! I was wondering...

11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably a wise investment. Can someone lend me a 20?

12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything. someone should tell my KIDS this...

13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield. My question is...does it matter, really, which one you are?

14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

16. A closed mouth gathers no foot. this is true...especially if you pair it with the next one...

17. Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.

20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it. And hopefully you don't NEED it Ever Ever again!

21. Never miss a good chance to shut up. Like the class I had to take Fall term last year "Introduction to public speaking." Told them I don't NEED this one! Do you have a class entitled "How to Shut Up"?

AND

22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. Sage advice from a voice of experience?

Plastic storage wonders

I read a story once about someone who never washed their Tupperware. When it was dirty, they just carried it out into the back garden and buried it.

My thoughts on that are many...
First, plastic isn't biodegradeable. So what kind of a garden is that going to be in a couple of years?
and what are this person's grandchildren going to be dealing with after they pass on?
Secondly, If this is a true story, I'm heading to the nearest stock broker to buy me some shares of Tupperware and Rubbermaid Industries.
Thirdly, which one of us, if we are HONEST with ourselves hasn't fleetingly entertained the idea of, if not burying that plastic monstrosity that holds spaghetti stains like superglue, at LEAST just snuggling it to the bottom of the trash can under the egg shells and coffee grounds. They are relatively cheap...no one will miss it...My friend Jeanne who sells Tupperware needs the business!

But you know, I really hate to get rid of those handy plastic reuseable containers. Kool Whip, Gold-n-soft, and those bake-in-the-microwave personal chocolate dessert bowls just work WONDERFULLY for cereal, soup and dog food.

Versatility is the name of the game here. My large plastic bowls have been used to collect apples, peaches, pears, rocks, fish, salamanders, slugs, Halloween candy and puke.
The medium ones I use for mixing cookies, pie dough, bread dough, meatloaf, washing the urine-soaked pieces of the hamster cage and then, ummmm, Puke.
The small ones come in handy for butter dishes, cereal bowls, cat food, dog water, Bug collections and, well, Puke.

With four kids, my favorite containers are those big buckets with lids that Ice Cream comes in! After the ravenous horde falls upon it as I unpack the groceries, the left over handled bucket is awesome at the beach, for freezing blanched corn or plums, refridgerating large quantities of soup and as an emergency toilet. WITH a lid, no less.

Now that I have totally grossed you out, you can call your friend and say, "OH! I would NEVER use my containers like that woman. She is a vulgar redneck!"
I know. Because I used to feel the same way. But there comes a time when you are traveling down a turnpike with no restroom in sight and a three year old SCREAMING for a potty.... Or when you have been up all night holding your seven year old over the toilet and the edge of the tub has worn a groove in your butt and you would give anything to just lay down on the living room floor next to the child and sleep for just two minutes...

Ya'll know what I'm sayin'...
Been there, done that.

I LOVE PLASTIC STORAGE CONTAINERS. :D Making life easier, one bowl at a time.

Early morning Drivel...

Number four keeps me giggling. She came home today from school with a band-aid on her finger.
"Mom! I got a cut and it was going to bleed, so they sent me to the NURSERY to get it fixed."

I was cooking cauliflower for dinner and she wanted to try one early. I always like raw cauliflower as a kid, so I told her it was alright. She took one bite and ran for the garbage can to spit it out.
"Mom, I do not like Koala-flower!"

It's so hard to type with a 7 lb. white cat on my keyboard. For some reason the last two weeks she has just glommed onto me and won't leave me alone. Maybe she knows I need some extra lovin' right now.

Got to go to a great birth last night. When I arrived, she was at 4 cm and so we talked about rupturing her membranes. She'd been laboring all day just working on effacement. She wanted to go for it, so we did.
WHAMMO! 32 minutes later we were holding a 10 lb. baby girl with skid marks on her forehead. WOW. Mom didn't even tear.

Got a new little van. 1989 Astro. I know, I know, I thought "That is TOO old". But it only has 168,000 miles on it AND has a GM Certified rebuilt engine with only 60,000. I couldn't pass up the deal AND I still have the Suburban. The gas mileage has already made a great difference.

Finals are coming up. I actually have one this week already. YIKES.

Ok. Enough rambling for 3:30 in the morning. Back to bed!

Extra! Extra! Read all about it...

My beautiful #3 had to get glasses. She's all up for it, so I guess that's good! And our insurance paid 100% which is VERY good! And Mommy had to get new glasses. Cuz mine were kinda trashed (scratched and held together with a chunk of paper clip). I also needed a stronger prescription...but no bifocals yet, thank goodness! It only took me about 43 tries with the cell phone to get a picture of myself. My hair is too long and my eyebrows are too thick. But, HEY, that's me all over!

EMT lab day yesterday. Always just WIPEs me out! Grabbed chicken at the local grocery for dinner. Too beat to cook. And we practiced Epinephrine injections on eachother. GAG. with sterile water, of course. Learned about activated charcoal administration, nitro, glucose gel, aspirin and all the other fun pharmacological things they let EMT's do now adays.

#4 tried to do a sleepover tonight but didn't even make it till 7pm before she called me sobbing. She has had "mommy-itis" severely the last two weeks. Poor bug.

My mom gave me the idea of making a Thanksgiving tree. So I got out a big piece of paper, drew a tree trunk on it and cut out some paper leaves. Each kiddo gets to write something they are thankful for every day till Thanksgiving and paste their leaf to the tree. Then we'll give it to Gramma at Dinner.
So I ask #4..."What are you thankful for, sweety?"
"Well, Mom, I am just SO thankful that I am cute!"

Really now.
Yes, I wrote it on the leaf. Along with her name. Like we wouldn't' know who said it.

This is going to be a long week. The girls don't have school at all.
I need to memorize at least 3 minutes of some piece of Americana (whatever THAT is) for speech class in two weeks.
Only two weeks till a final in Algebra. Aaaaagh!
And my truck is barely running. Please pray for my car situation. It looks like I am going to have to drive LOTS more next term for school and I don't know how I will swing it with this rig. I know God has a plan and I'm trying to trust and not stress about it.

Trying. Not succeeding much. **Smiles**
Just in case I don't see you before Thursday...
Have a blessed week, my friends. I wish you a peaceful holiday.

Funny Photos and an apology

Cat T.V. (aka Microwave)

Brother's door note - "Danger: enter at your own risk. I have eyes and ears in this room so I'll KNOW!"
The girls answer to that..."Enter is you DARE ! If you have any questions, read this (insert arrow here)"
"Don't enter only if you are my mommy, baby sitter, little sister, friend...you may come in." NOTE - the word "brother" is conspicuously ABSENT!
OH and wait...we have to let the cats in, too!

But not brother! Ohhhhh, Nooooo! Came home last night after class to find these notes on the bedroom doors.

I was throwing a major "pity party", too, when I came home after doing prenatal clinic all day, a test on the respiratory system in class that night and at 9pm, facing a pile of homework, find dirty dishes, garbage to pick up and four loads of laundry that apparently no one except MOTHER is allowed to TOUCH.

Then I saw the notes on the doors and smiled. Kinda gave me a reality check on the poopy attitude, ya' know. I have SO many blessings - and here I am going "Poor Me".

For the record, I'm sorry. Sorry, God. Sorry, Kids. Sorry, MG. I hope you all know how much I love you. My human side was showing.

My prayer life gets a jump start...

Please don't think I'm making fun of my Heavenly Father or prayer here. Because I believe He is the only one who saved me today...

Have you ever found yourself hanging upside down in the dentist's chair and he/she says...
"Well, I'm gonna TRY this one but it MAY end up being a root canal and then we'll have to REFER you out to a specialist. OK, then! Let's get started!"

And I got right with God in about 1.2 seconds.
Then I began fervent intercessory prayer. For myself!

"OH please GOD, no PAIN! OH please GOD, no PAIN!
OH please GOD no root canal! OH please GOD no root canal!"

It turned out alright...for now. BUT, if it starts hurting so bad that "even Tylenol doesn't help" then "we may need to go ahead with that root canal."

I think I'd rather go ahead with an extraction!
Or dropping a bowling ball on my foot.
Or piercing my eyelids with needles....

Ummm, ok, you get the idea.

And I have the added bonus of being forgiven now for all the naughty things I have done in the last couple of weeks.

I needed to "catch up" anyway.

Laying Babies

I discovered today why #4 cracks me up so much.

I'm putting on her shoes and, out of the clear blue, she says...
"Mom, I know that my tongue is connected to my laugh box in my heart."

WELL! That certainly answers alot of things.

Another funny from her...kind of an ongoing theme the last week or so, but we discussed it in depth today.
She wants to make sure we are done having children.

"Mom, promise me you aren't going to lay any more babies!"

I told her I wasn't planning on it...but I didn't bother to get into the "birth vs. hatching" issue.

I was laughing too hard.

#4 strikes again...

You probably can't see it real well, but she wanted to be a "mouse". So I took an eyeliner pencil and drew mouse nose and whiskers on her.
TOO CUTE!

And NO she's not na**ed...Trust me, she's wearing shorts.
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"Mom, Look at my purse!"

Ummmm, honey, that isn't your's.

"I know. Oh well. But I've got TICKETS!"

Really? To a concert or a show?

"No! To the meat store."

WOW. Whatcha gonna buy? Hamburger or steak?

"MOOoom! Not that! The MEET store...you know, where you MEET people?"

(She could have added "Duh?!? and I wouldn't have felt stupider. Is that a word?)

But it WAS pretty funny.

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"Mom, I'm gonna live with you forever. Ok, maybe just till I get married or learn how to drive."

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We went and got "school" haircuts yesterday.

Trimmed #2's hair short. Got mine tamed...for the time bein'.

And got #4's long curls shaped some. Bangs trimmed.

I say "WOW, you look Beautiful!"

"I know! Everyone in my class will be jealous, too!"

Oh My.

I really DON'T know it all.

I really don't know it all. Unfortunately, I often act like I do. I can be bossy and pushy. A goody-two-shoes with attitude.

Got a wake up call last night.

Someone asked me if I still liked them. Because I used to "enjoy" doing things for them and I don't anymore.

OF COURSE I still care for them! But I'm tired.

I think it's not that I don't enjoy helping. I think it's that I'm tired of being an enabler. Reminds me of that old adage, "give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach him to fish and he eats for a lifetime."

I don't mind helping some. But I've already got a family to care for and my own life to manage - I don't need another person to "mother". I want them to start doing things for themselves. I get frustrated when I watch them halfheartedly try something then either abandon it or get frustrated because they "can't do it". They say "there has to be a way to do this!" So I show them, line it all out, make a list of suggestions.

And nothing happens.

And I lose respect for them.

Am I being a hard nose? Am I being pious? I have never had much patience for those who don't try to better themselves. That is a hard thing to admit. I've had friends who say "I can't find a job" - and I say "Then you aren't trying or your sites are set too high." I'll take them out and get 20 applications done in a day. And surprise, they get a job! Maybe not the one they wanted, but it's money.

In the past, I have "helped" others until I no longer enjoyed it; till I was angry at myself and angry at them. It made me a Not-Nice person. And I think that's one of the biggest challenges I had with my ex. He became like another child to me.

And I had absolutely no respect for him.

Because he wouldn't be responsible for his own actions. It was always "someone else's fault".

And I don't ever want to be in that position again. I want to empower others. Help them move UP and better themselves.

Yet how do I do that and still show that I care about them at the same time? One can say "I love you" with words, but it seems hard sometimes to say "Please clean up after yourself", "Make your own phone calls", "get motivated!" without sounding mean or "better-than-thou".

Am I making any sense here?

Maybe it's just too early in the morning.

Here's a funny anyway! My auntie sent this to me...JUST WHAT I NEED!