MORNING!

OK, it's a little to early to be that loud. But I actually feel halfway positive this morning.

It's a good thing, I guess.

Feel like i'm getting caught up a little on my homework. Still got bills I can't pay, but HEY, that's my life!

Got woke up early when the Rescue Pager went off just before 6. An energetic LOL was out for her morning walk and fell. Poor dear. She was SOOOoooo embarrassed!
But better to be safe than sorry so we checked her out. Chief and I were the only ones who showed up so we went with it. Two EMT Basics against the world, hoping against hope that things wouldn't go south. Turns out one of our first responders lived right where she fell so we had help on scene. WHEW. She decided she just wanted her friend to drive her to the ER anyway.

Well, kids are stirring. Do have to tell you one funny before I go, though. Last night we were having a sit down dinner together. Was #2's idea ... we don't do it very often. It was nice! ANYWAY, #3 says "WOW, I've got a mosquito bite and it's BIG. Almost feels like a monkey bump." (I don't know if you dealt with those when you were a kid but it's when someone thumps you hard enough with their knuckle to raise a bump on your muscle.)
#4 sits up and looks at her with these HUGE eyes and exclaims "SISTER, WHEN have YOU been feeling a monkey's BUM?!?"
Ok, Ok, it struck me funny. I couldn't talk for about ten minutes, tears streaming down my face. We all had a good giggle over that one!

Got to PLAY in a helicopter!!

Got to go play on Life Flight for Drill Wednesday night.
At the risk of sounding like an excited five-year-old...

IT WAS VERY COOL!

No, this is NOT an ad for Aquafina bottled water.
Looking up from where they load the patient in...

And I just HAD to include this picture. It CRACKED me up!
Right after I got a chuckle over the "No Smoking" sticker just above the patient compartment on the inside of the chopper, I moved around to the tail section and saw this...

DANGER?!?!
No kidding! Yah THINK?

Unloading the pain in my head

Standing in the kitchen in my nightgown baking cookies at 11am, it felt like it was gonna be a lazy day. When I hear my fire pager go off, I am dressed in 30 seconds flat and at a dead run out the door.
An Accident. Very serious. Semi truck involved. Crud...

After sprinting into the station and hoppin into the forty pound fire outfit, I'm grateful for five minutes to catch my breath as we scream lights-and-sirens for the intersection out in the country.

Radio call - "Medic enroute"
Dispatch response - "Copy. One confirmed D.O.A."

OH. NO. I want to go home now. Stop this rig and let me off.
but I suck it up and swallow the fear as we roll up. Blocking the highway. Big blue semi truck sits straight in the lane, driver's side fender crushed in. Not alot of damage...maybe...
But no, over there in the field. A small brown wad of metal that used to be a car.
He's cool as I touch his neck...so pale. I want to shake him and wake him up. You're just a teenager...25 at the most! Wake up! Wake up!

As I draw back and we cover him from the view of the backed up traffic, someone sees them.

The turn out pants scrunched down around the steel-toed boots.
The fire helmet.
The navy Fire Dept sweatshirt of a neighboring town.

I turn away quickly and find the truck driver. He's trying to photograph everything with the disposable camera his company gave him for just such a situation. He's been told to "use it up" and he's doing his best. Concentrating on it so he won't see...won't hear...won't feel.

"hey, I'm Janean with the Rescue. Do you hurt anywhere?"
Wrenched his back a little, but he insists he's fine.
I rest my hand on his back to feel for deformity or tenderness as he hangs his head. "are you SURE you are OK?"
The head of the big tough truck driver leans over onto my shoulder as the tears threaten. "I couldn't stop! I couldn't do anything! He was going so fast!" In a voice choked with emotion, he tries to explain.

But it doesn't matter what happened. A firefighter is gone. Someone's parents are crying tonight. And the fire/EMS service system in our valley is in shock. It hurts.

Please, God, be with them all.

One step closer...

I'm one step closer to my Paramedics degree.
Passed the Oregon State EMT-Intermediate written exam.

Oooooh WOW! I am surprised. I didn't think I did.

Serious! My EMT-I teacher told me I'm to sexxy for my brain. FUNNNY lady!

This weekend is the practical State exam. Candidates report to five different stations and perform/talk through the skill required at each station. As far as I understand it, I will be tested on...

• Intraosseous infusion
• IV Administration/Bolus medication administration
• Trauma assessment
• Medical emergency assessment
• Mega-code cardiac arrest management

If I pass this, I will be an Intermediate. A couple more pre-req's and I'll be ready to apply to the Paramedics class.

Will I actually go that far? I don't know. I don't know what is going to happen in my future.
I do know that it is scary kinda just staggering forward and waiting for God to direct my life. I do know that I am going to take advantage of every educational opportunity that comes my way. I do know that I will serve others every chance I get. Because that is who I am.

Have an interview next week to volly on an ambulance service...the same one I did ride-alongs with a couple weeks ago. Am not sure what kind of time I can devote or what type of commitment they are expecting from me, but I guess we'll find out next Friday. I DO know that I need the experience!

But as for what I am going to do to support my family...? still up in the air right now. I have confidence that God has a plan. I have confidence that He will let me know when that perfect job comes along.
Until then, I'll just keep on keepin' on.

And, as my darling gram used to say, I'll keep lookin' up!

Ride Along

I've been trying to get some ambulance time in.
Think I've mentioned before that I've only been on like FOUR transports in my life. Responding with the rescue here, we just go package them up and stabilize them for the Big City Ambulance to transport.

But I found "Middle City" Ambulance. AWESOME people. Not too busy.
Been hangin out there lately.

One twelve hour shift. Nuttin'
Second twelve hour shift. Got three calls in the afternoon.
number one was a fifty-ish lady with chest pain. Biker mama. Very self conscious.
So we hooked her up to the monitor. The Paramedic can't rule OUT any heart problems. EKG looks a little suspicious. Hubby wants to drive her in.
Paramedic starts giving her the schpiel. "This should be a wake up call, take your medicine, eat healthier, lose some weight...".
I look over and she is twisting a kleenex in her lap. Eyes big and watery. So I swoop in and hug her. Right there in front of God and everybody. "I know. I know." Pat the shoulder. Rock her some as she sobs on my uniform.

Second patient. Chronic cancer. Tired of fighting.
In incredible pain. I smooth his hair. Talk to him.
Tell him I understand how he could get frustrated. But he's got a great wife.
Lots to live for...lots to fight for.
Every once in awhile, we hit a bump. He grimaces in pain.
Soon tears begin to well in his eyes again. Because he's on his back but leaning kind of to the right, the tear pools over his eye. So I wipe it off gently with my finger. And try to steady him on the cot with my knees so the jarring isn't so bad.

Third patient. Elderly man. Fall. Hurting. Nursing home...
Heading in to the hospital. He's trying to be brave and not take pain meds.
The poor man probably has a broken hip, for pete's sake.
I told him...we are getting to the hospital soon. they are going to be moving you around. TAKE SOME PAIN MEDS. He smiles at me and says..."OK, maybe it does hurt some."
Then he goes back to staring at the ceiling.
And I notice ... food. something pink. Maybe medicine. dribbled down out of both corners of his mouth on to his neck. caked on his chin.
So I ask the paramedic for a baby wipe. They don't carry any. But he helps me find some gauze and lets me open a small sterile water.
I wash his 95 year old skin. And after we get to the hospital, they cut off his shirts. So I dress him in a gown. And make a joke about him showing his chest off to everyone.
Then I smooth his hair down, tell him I have to go but I'll be thinking of him.

End of my shift, riding home in the back of the ambulance with the paramedic, Bob.
"I like your style, you know. Not many people have that empathy you do. You take good care of your people."

Almost made me cry.
Definitely made me grin!

Am I wild and crazy enough?

My kids think I am the coolest mom in the world.
Because we now have....in our dining room...a five foot high 3-D cardboard display from the local video game store. It can actually be used for some storage as it has little shelves in the sides.
But I don't think that is what attracts my children to it.

It's probably the two foot Poke*on characters on each side.
That and the fact that they got to carry it out of the video store and share the van with it all the way home.

AND I had the nerve to ask for it ... AND I'm allowing them to have it in the living room.

It actually kinda blends well with my chosen decor theme of Early American Yard Sale.
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Had EMT Intermediate Mock practical exams today. I went with my attitude in the toilet and fully did not expect to pass anything.
For the first two hours, I followed that pattern. I couldn't think, much less try to get an IV started, push a bolus of Lasix or run a code.

By 11am, I started feeling a little more myself. Don't know what is wrong with me...

Didn't have anyone to watch the kids today due to a "friend" not following through with her obligations. That made me sad.

I miss Loverboy, I miss Papa. It's probably all PMS, but knowing that doesn't change the fact that I feel that way.

Yes, I passed all six stations. IntraOsseus infusion, Trauma assessment, Medical assessment, IV start and medication bolus, Airway placement and Mega Codes.
Even got a couple of compliments from the instructors.

So why do I feel like running in my room and crying into my pillow? SIGH
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I've got the sewing bug. I want to sew SO badly. Have about 3 projects I REALLY want to get going on. I want to make a shirt for Papa. Got the fabric all picked out.
Need to make a dress for a friend...she asked me to.
And have a shirt all cut out to finish for my LB. He looks so handsome in them!

SIGH. Maybe soon.

He's lucky I'm not wild and crazy. I'd just get in the van and start driving right now! Just to be with him for ONE day before I had to come home. Just to touch him, hold him. Just to sit with Papa for an hour...maybe read to him and tell him how much I love him.

Still not real sure I won't do it...

Today

Today was kinda funny.

Bought myself one of those exercise balls. Hard not to call it a "birthing ball" cuz that's what I've always seen it used for. But had a meeting with my Basic Conditioning instructor yesterday and she recommended one. Gave me some ideas.
So I got one...80 inches around and HOT PINK. Came with a DVD, 2 lb. hand weights AND exercise bands.
#3 went to school and told her teacher all about it.
Yah. Major embarrassing.
Plus the kids keep snagging it and playing with it.

I give it about a week before they've popped it.
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Went on a rescue call today. Older lady, slurring her words, having a hard time staying awake. So I go in and run the call. Have four guys with me. Chiefs are out of town at a conference.
We get back in the rig and sit there for a second. The driver turns around and says
"SO! When did you get YOUR basic?"
Kinda takes me by surprise as I am not sure what he means.
Then it dawns on me that he's an EMT Basic and he THINKS I have gone in and taken over a call when I am a lower ranking First Responder.

I look him level in the eye and say "About eight months. Why? Did I do something wrong?"

He turns forward, starts the rig and says, "No. She's still alive, isn't she?"

Don't know what his problem is. Was he just being sarcastic? DID I do something wrong? Why does he feel the need to challenge me?
He IS shorter than me. I should just go meet him behind the firehouse and beat him up.

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Went to the kids' play and science fair tonight.
They did a scene from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. It was SO CUTE. They let the kids with bigger parts read from the playbook so it wasn't REAL sophisticated...but that's ok. There are only about 12 kids in the entire elementary school. They made their own set out of refridgerator boxes.
It was the scene where Augustus Glub falls in the chocolate river. The kid who played Augustus is MAJORLY hyper. Can't sit still for two seconds. I'm NOT EVEN exaggerating.
So when it comes time for him to fall in the river, the teacher whispers "JUMP!" and he jumps in between the brown cardboard waves.
The play continues. My number three is "Willy Wonka" and Numbers 2 and 4 play parents of the spoiled children. So I'm trying to pay attention to them.

But every once in awhile...a little sneaker or hand pokes up over the cardboard.
and again. I giggle. His eyes peak out.
and I guffaw. THEN a whole leg sticks straight up in the air.
He JUST CAN'T hold still. Looks like he's doing the backstroke in there.

It was Hilarious!

I needed a good laugh.

My first MCI

Multiple (more than one)
Casualty (injured person)
Incident

Went to LB's for the weekend. I know...I know...AGAIN!?!? but I just can't stay away from the man. Love him, love him, love him!
Don't know if I've mentioned it or not, but his Papa is very ill. I worry about him. Lots. Incredible man. I love him, too, in case you couldn't tell.
As I was leaving, I ducked into Papa's room to tell him goodbye. He opens his eyes, looks up at me and says "How's my girl?"

Wow! I don't know why but that just touched me to my very soul.
Squeezed his bony shoulders, kissed his forehead and hustled out before he could see me cry.
WOW!

Long trip home...about a five to six hour drive depending on how many times the kiddos have to go potty. Left my sweet darling man standing in the driveway sadly waving after me.
Feelin' lower than a snakes' belly cuz I miss him so much.

About an hour away from home, two major Interstates merging.
I'm in the hammer lane heading for a left hand exit when brake lights turn the sky red. I don't know if I can stop in time...
But I do. Narrowly missing a flare and about four other cars.
As we roll forward in the line of traffic, I see debris all over the road.
Accident - big one. Several cars and pieces of cars.
No emergency vehicles. Not one.

I roll down my window and holler at someone - "I'm an EMT! Does anyone need help?"
They say yes, there is a woman hurt.

That does it. I whip the van well off the road and out of danger. Kids and dog safe and locked in.
Bail out and run across four lane interstate.

No one else medically trained is on scene yet. I ask someone to make sure 911 has been called.
My brain is cranking.
I am the only EMT on scene with at least four patients on my hands.
This is Triage. Who is hurt the worst and needs me the most?
And which one of these multiple bystanders can I get to help me?

Check 20-something guy leaning against the cement barrier.
"Hi, I'm Janean and I'm an EMT. What hurts?"
Standing outside his car when he was hit by another car.
Awake and alert. Get him laid down and ask him NOT to move.

Run to 50-something woman. Blood everywhere.
Same deal. Standing outside her car when hit by another vehicle.
Multiple lacerations, her long hair matted with blood.
But she is awake and reasonably alert.
Get her laid down and Hero Boy comes out of nowhere.
"Do we need something for that wound?"

HECK YAH! He strips off his shirt and presses it to her head.
And he promises to stay with her until the ambulance arrives.
I could just KISS him!

Run to young couple. Standing up, holding eachother and crying.
I don't know where they came from, but she has an injured arm.
His leg is scraped up. She says they "jumped out of the way when they saw it coming".
I told her GOOD JOB, GIRL! Gave her instructions on self-splinting her arm.
Rolled his pants up away from the damaged leg. Asked them to lean against
the divider and wait for the fire and ambulance. Just relax and breathe...

Run back to 20-something guy.
He's getting shocky. Shaking like a leaf. Talking a mile a minute.
Pelvic injuries, knee, shoulder. Wants his mom. Scared...He says "just please, make sure they tell me what they are doing. If I know what's coming, I can handle it."
So I hold his head in line (C-spine) and talk to him.
He has so many questions...and I have no answers. I just try to be as honest with him as I can.

They are gonna come put you on a backboard and strap you down. It will probably hurt, but we'll do it as fast as we can. Yes, they'll give you something for the pain. I don't know if you will be able to go back to work in a week, dude. It all depends on what you have injured here. Yes, they will call your mom. No, don't move your head.

The fire and ambulances arrive. Entire four lane interstate shut down. They are discussing over his head whether or not to make him an "Entry". So I lean down and explain quietly in his ear that they are trying to decide if he is hurt badly enough to enter him in the trauma system. Turn him, backboard him, strap him down. I'm with him the whole way. As they get ready to lift his backboard on a gurney, the medic in charge says "thank you - we'll take over from here" and I stand to go.

Sweet kid is young enough to be my son. He reaches for me. Squeezes my hands.
I look into his eyes. "I'll be thinking of you."
Blonde fluffy hair disappearing toward the open ambulance doors.

Please, God, let them all be ok.
Thank you for letting me be there and know enough to help them. Thank you, Father, for using me. I release them into your hands.

The kids said a fireman had checked on them. They told him their mom was helping.
15 minutes after I clear the scene, I stop to get a drink and let a kid visit the bathroom. As I'm paying for my lemonade, the checker says, "Ummmmm, you have blood all over your arm."

I didn't even notice...

Stage Fright

Had my final "final" today for Winter term. And it was the biggest, hairiest one of all. But I passed it...
And I'm getting an "A" in the class so far. Still have six weeks to go in the next term before I become a certified EMT Intermediate.

Got a cramp in my arm from hookin' my thumbs in my suspenders. **GRIN**

Still, I have this squeaky little voice in the background saying...
"you are gonna learn ALL this stuff...and then, when the time comes and you have to actually KNOW it, you're gonna forget it or mess up and somebody will get hurt! What do you think you're doing? You're just a fake!"

Performance anxiety, I guess.
But Squeaky has a point.

If I'm singing a concert or recording a CD and I go flat or hit the wrong note, what happens? Nuttin'! I look silly or I record over the rough spot.

If I slip and say a cuss word in front of my kids, what happens? Nuttin'! I apologize and use it as a learning experience.

If I spell something wrong in a blog post, what happens? Nuttin'! That's why God made SpellCheck and "Delete".

If I answer the phone wrong at the county office, what happens? Nuttin'! Except someone thinks they called Coastal City Hospital instead of the Big Y County Cleanup office.
And we giggle over the phone at eachother and life goes on.

BUT...
What happens if I need to start an IV on a trauma patient and all the veins have collapsed from shock?
What happens if I miscalculate the dosage of Atropine or Nubain?
What happens if those little hills and valleys on the ECG monitor don't look like anything I've ever seen before?
What then? ALOT! And life may NOT go on!

Lord, please protect these unsuspecting people from my fumbling incompetence. You know I'm just trying to help; please let me be able to find those little filing drawers of information nestled among the cobwebs when I desperately need the information they contain.

And while Yer at it, could You make my knees stop knocking together. It's not very lady like. My kids think I'm doing the jitterbug.

Yah, it's 4:00 AM. Do you know where YOUR kids are?

Apparently some parents don't!
Just got back from a call.

Family woke up to find a teenager unconscious in their laundry room/back porch.

He thought it was his home.

But he "only had two beers, officer!" Just a high school kid. But actually, I was happy about that, because the dispatcher's report said he "appeared to be nine years old". And I was fixin' to get my panties in a wad. Not that upper teens is better for a kid to get drunk...but "NINE" would have really ticked me off.

No shoes, mud all over him, shakin' like a leaf once the deputies woke him up. They gave him the third degree as officers of the law are wont to do. Turns out they had been looking for "two teenagers fighting in the city park" around midnight. Boy said he was SUPPOSED to be spending the night with a friend.
**SIGH** Won't his parents be surprised?

Then I took his vitals.
Had to show him how the Oxygen saturation monitor worked by putting it on my own finger, cuz he was afraid I was going to draw blood.
Couple of abrasions. Didn't want to go to the hospital. Can't just leave him...so Deputy tried to call his parents.

and tried to call his parents...

and tried to call his parents...

He was sittin' outside on a folding chair, just freezing. Thin blanket around his shoulders. Everyone walks away to do their investigating and check out the rest of the garage and such...
LEAVING ME standin' there with the kid.
the first thought in my head was..."OH crud! What if he decides to run?"

The second thought in my head was "He's just a scared kid and everyone is treating him like he has the plague just because he did something wrong. What would Jesus do?"
So I walked over next to where he sat, stood beside him and put my arm around his shoulders. He kinda leaned his head over against my hip.
I said "Bet yer gonna get in a little bit of trouble over this, huh?"
And we talked for a bit. He was bummed cuz he wouldn't be able to go on a Spring Break trip with friends and he'd lost his cell phone. I tried calling it for him to see if it was anywhere near. Didn't find it. Bein's as how he had been seen running into the local slough? He probably never will.

His parents never did answer the phone.

So the Deputies took him home.

And the lady of the house came out as I was packing up our equipment.
"Hey! You were here a couple of months ago to take care of my daughter when she cut her leg...I remember you!"
I was all flattered thinking she had remembered my compassion or my efficiency as a medic. So I did the humble "thank you, Ma'am. That's why we do what we do."
And she says...

"Yep! I remember you cuz you were wearing those VERY SAME Tinkerbell pajama pants!"

Ego ... Deflaaatttinnng.... kinda like a whoopee cushion someone sat on really slowly.

Ah well. It is funny though!

Have a good day, Ya'll!

DeJa Vu...Why I do this

Had my first MVA (motor vehicle accident) response today.
I usually don't go on them, because I'm a fat old lady and running, jumping, wading, lifting, sweeping and carrying while weighing 40 lbs of fire turnouts is better left to the young bucks. And I never started out to BE an EMT. Was just taking the Paramedic courses to make me a better midwife, you know.

But something today told me to go. So I listened...
Boy, was I glad I did! Got to the station. I don't get a key, cuz I'm still a pro-bee. The other firefighter meeting me at the door? A pro-bee, too. We wait about 90 seconds...and the chief shows up. WHEW.

Run to the back of the station to get my turnouts on. Mine went in the last available space...near the coffee pot. I keep one flap of my turnout pants over my right boot to protect it from stray coffee grounds.
RATS! Forgot to wear socks. Gonna be sorry by the time I get home in these steel-toed boots.
Get it all on fast as I can and do my best imitation of a jog back toward the front of the station. Firefighter in my way. Chief yellin' out the window of the rescue "JANEAN, MOVE IT!"

Dodge the firefighter, hurl myself in the back door. Wait...I'm the only one in here besides the driver and the chief. It's 11am on a Saturday morning. WHERE IS EVERYBODY?

As we take off out the bay, command calls for additional ambulances, put lifeflight on standby.
Whereupon, this fat old lady starts into fervent prayer as we scream down the center yellow line, lights and sirens. "Please, God, Please, God, Please, God. Make me capable. Please make me capable. I only want to help"!

Hop out the rescue. Highway is blocked. Passing on a blind corner is a bad thing. Especially for the poor couple heading the other direction who were just merrily going to visit family and now will spend the rest of the day if not the rest of the week in the hospital.
Command sends me to the most critically injured. Chief is there. I suddenly go blank. Standing on the shoulder of the road looking down into the ditch at the SUV I holler "CHIEF! Where do you want me?"

Well, he looks at me like I'm insane. But directs me to go around the rig, get in the back seat and hold C-spine on the driver. So here I am, dressed like a yellow pillsbury dough boy, jumping down into the ditch, wading across the ditch and squeezing in the back passengers door.
OH Praise the LORD, they had the middle seat laid down! That makes it much easier.

"Hello, Sir. My name is Janean and I'm with Podunk Rescue. Gonna hold on to your head here. Can you tell me where it hurts?"
He's worried about his lady. He's worried about his dogs. He's worried about his car. He's worried about his sister. He can't find his cell phone to call her. It was on his hip...that just happened to be the point of impact.
So I promise him I will try to find it AFTER we get him out.

Which takes thirty minutes, several firefighters and a few pieces of heavy equipment.

But we got him out. And up the bank. And into the ambulance. I wish I would have put oxygen on him. I wish I would have thought to lay his seat back sooner. I wish I'd have at least put a pulse oximeter on his finger. But I couldn't let go of his head. And no one else seemed inclined to do so.
And he was talking to me. We were about the same age. Found out where he lived. Thanked him for having the back seats down. He laughed and said he'd make sure and arrange for that next time.

Then we agreed there better NOT be a next time.

As they were loading him into Big City Ambulance one, I found the three pieces of his cell phone under his mangled twisted drivers door. Managed to hold them together long enough to call his family and tell them he was going to the Big, Big city Hospital.
Then found his lady's parents rushing through the crowd and gave them his muddy little chunked up phone.

Stood there for a minute beside the rescue. Put away the equipment. Now what? I should be doing something to help. Chief suggests I grab a broom. So I do. Sweepin up the pieces of plastic, glass, CD's, papers, metal...

I think they will all be fine. Chief says I did good for my first time. I don't think I did. I could have done more. Should have done more. Maybe just wish I could have done more...

But I sure was sweatin' by the time I got back to the station. Think I lost about 10 lbs of water weight today.

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DeJa Vu...
My mom calls.
She just called this morning! What's up? I haven't talked to her in two weeks.

My uncle was in a head on accident this morning. Truck crossed the center line into his lane. His airbag deployed.
Mom was telling me about his injuries and I got the goose bumps.

The exact same time this morning I was holding the head of an injured man as the result of a head on accident...
Another volunteer rescuer in a city fifty miles away was holding the head of my uncle...
Both men have the exact same injuries. Both men survived because of their airbags. Both men were rescued and comforted by volunteer EMT's who went when they much rather would have stayed home.

To the Rescuer who held my uncles' head... You Rock, Brother!

Pay it forward...

"Keep Lookin' up..." as my Gram would say

It's Christmas Eve.

I am determined to be cheerful. Even though Loverboy is Three...Hundred...Miles...away.

So here's a couple of Number four funnies that keep me giggling.
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"Mom, I know how to play football!"
Well, I'm astonished at this as she is only SIX.
And Female.
VERY Female.
Foo Foo dresses and fancy shoes female.
"Yes, Mom. Here's what you do! You throw the ball and then you RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!"

Hmmm, that about sums it up.
I'm not a big football fan...can ya' tell?

Oooo, and here's a GOOD one.
"Mom, I've figured out why I talk so much."
"oh really, please share!"
"Well, I discovered I have a bigger talkbone than other people."
"hmm, well, that explains it."
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Santa came today. Twice.
The first time, he looked like my Rescue crew.
The second time, he suspiciously looked like my pastor.

It's amazing how he can change shape like that!! Both times, even though I felt ashamed, I also felt blessed. Now I have four kids pestering me every three minutes to "open just ONE present, Mom, PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!"
So I told them, OK, after I finish my dinner.

It's amazing how long I can stretch out five pierogies. And how many times they can ask.
I think I'm taking kind of a sadistic glee in making them wait.

Turn in my Mommy license again.
I'll bring it right into the licensing bureau and hand it over with a smile.

cuz I'm rebellious like that, you know.

Had a bad call this morning. Older lady couldn't breathe. And she WASN"T kidding!
By the time we got her loaded in the ambulance, she had gone into respiratory arrest.
One of the hardest parts of my work is not knowing what happened. How did it turn out?
Did they save her? Will she be here to spend Christmas with her kids and grandkids?

While we were waiting for the ambulance to find us, she looks up from her wheelchair and says "Oh, NO! I haven't put my bra on yet!"
So I lean down as I'm taking her blood pressure and whisper,
"Don't worry, dear, I haven't either!"

It was hard for her to laugh with the oxygen mask on her face and the oxygen saturation of her blood around HALF of what it should be but she did manage a chuckle. And I'm glad the last thing she saw was my smiling face as I tucked her the stretcher blanket around her feet and assured her we were doing our best to hurry and get her into the warm ambulance.

As she slowly turned grey before my eyes and lost consciousness.

Please, God, watch over her and her family.

C.P.R. - Times two

You know, when you are taking First Responder, EMT, or First Aid classes they teach you how to do CPR. And half the time, the horseplay distracts you whether or not you participate. But you manage to get your little card to put in your wallet and you don't have to take this dumb class again for TWO whole YEARS.

And you think to yourself, "you know, the odds are that I am NEVER going to use this." In fact, you PRAY that you never have to use it.
And after about a week, you forget how many compressions to how many breaths and how to do the Sellick maneuver.

Now I've helped with CPR two times in two days.

Two days ago, I had my first big bad hairy call.
Violent Death.
And you know, I can't talk about it much because of HI*PA and all that privacy legal beagle.

Last night, tones went off for a cardiac arrest.
Delta level.

Which is bad...I think. I still haven't gotten the hang of it. Logical progression in my brain would make Alpha BAD and Delta not-so-bad. But I guess it's the other way around.
Anyway, I ended up on the rescue.
And we did all we could.

Again, HIP*A. Can't say much. But I was blessed to the tips of my toes, when the daughter giggled and said "Mom is SO HAPPY to be home with Dad right now!" The look on her face was pure joy and you could tell she meant what she was saying.

Mom was over 90. I'm glad that we weren't able to bring her back. Is that wrong?

Let it snow, let it snow.... NOT!

I think that I really, really, really REALLY don't like snow...

and subzero temperatures...

and vehicles with rear-wheel drive in the above mentioned conditions.

The snow came down on Sunday. Not much of it, but in Oregon it doesn't take alot of it to totally bring the world to a screeching halt.
Went outside and stood on the porch. Total and complete quiet.
No cars. No neighbors voices. No highway noise. Nothing...
I could hear frogs breathing in the next county.

If they weren't frozen that is.

I got to go on the rescue twice yesterday and once today. Calls weren't major, but the folks needed help. And I'm starting to learn where things are in the jump kit. Even started the O2 by myself with a nonrebreather mask.
Talked about it in class...acted it out. But never actually DONE it.

Don't be scared. You don't live near me.

The first few times the tones went off, my house instantaneously became a Chinese Firedrill. (My apologies if you are chinese). The kids start running in circles, the dog is barking and running trying not to get stepped on. The cats are running for the nearest high spot. I am trying to get around the ironing board, grab my medic jacket and my pager and my cell phone, get my shoes on and get out the door.

Ummmm...YAH! Not so much.

So after the second time, I called them all together and said "Alright, guys. When you hear the tones go off, FREEZE. Whereever you are...DON'T move. That way I can dodge around you. When you hear me holler 'see ya soon' and close the front door, THEN you can move."
They are starting to get the hang of it.
And I'm realizing that I need to have step in shoes.
And I need to wear socks ALL the time...or at least have some handy to get into fast.
And that I can grab the pager and listen to the call details as I am running down the porch instead of waiting.
And that the street about one block away is SLICKER THAN SNOT!
I just about lost it earlier today. Started fishtailing and appraising the ditches to see which one was the shallowest. But got it straightened out ...
and SLOWED my HINEY down.

My family Christmas Celebration this Saturday has been cancelled.
Which is good, cuz it was a BIG HUGE source of stress for me.

However, I have to make certain pickup sites in the next few days in order to have a Christmas for my kids. Still on the charity list. Someday, I won't be. Someday, I won't have to go stand in line at the Salvation Army to have gifts for my kids. Someday, I won't have to look in my Assistant Fire Chief's eyes and say I can't come help wrap the charity gifts at the station because some of them are for MY kids. Someday, I will be able to give presents to others again like I used to.
Someday...

I did scrape up money for a tree, though. And it's a good one.
Can't remember if I told you already or not. But it's one of the benefits of living in Oregon where we GROW the trees. Got a nice seven footer for fifteen bucks.

But I won't be able to visit Loverboy like I wanted to.
And I won't go to my parents. It's a matter of principals.
And everyone else has their own things to do.
So unless God intervenes and has other plans, it'll just be me and the kiddos for the holidays.

That's ok. We'll have our Birthday party for Jesus. The girls want to make Him a Teddy Bear cake this year. With sprinkles.
And we have candles.
And we'll sing to Him... and remember that this party is HIS gig, not ours.

Gonna sneak out in the morning and try to make it to town. I'm out of Laundry soap and dishwasher soap. Mainly because i was using the laundry soap in the dishwasher.
So we have fluffy soft dishes that smell Mountain Fresh.

Turn in my mommy license again.

School was cancelled for Monday and Tuesday here. And Tuesday was supposed to be the kids' last day before holiday break.
SOOOOOOOO, I've got four kids home in a house in freezing cold weather with Christmas Anticipation and Cabin Fever. Till January fifth.

I'll just hand in that Mommy License RIGHT now. Don't bother giving it back till AFTER the holidays, thank you very much. :D

And you think I'm being funny...

bed time!