I wish I could sleep.
Actually, I wish my kids would sleep.
And the cat...which is what woke me up originally. At about 2:45.
Alllllmost back to sleep then...
"MOM!" Right behind me. I think I screamed. Scared the stuffin' out of me.
Her TV had static and it woke her up.
Why do I have TV in their room? Well, right now, it's a good thing. BECAUSE two of the three girls are still awake. And it'll keep them occupied till they fall back to sleep. OH BOY are we all gonna be happy tomorrow. NOT!
I know, I know. What a cruddy mother!
I can't go back to sleep. It's 4:30am. I've been online for an hour applying for scholarships. WHY?
I'm boring you, aren't I?
Cuz I'm worried.
There's a verse somewhere in the Bible about how worrying won't add an inch to your height. Which, I think, means worrying doesn't change anything.
I'm going to wake up in the morning and still have no gas, no milk, no eggs, no flour and still be broke. I should look at the positive side.
I've got sugar and butter. And enough bread for toast in the morning. And about 20 lb.s of hamburger in the freezer. And an apple tree out front. And canned green beans.
So that's good.
But does that stop me from worrying about it and regretting the fact that I bought them all Happy Meals two weeks ago and if I hadn't done that, I'd still have that money right now and I wouldn't be IN THIS SITUATION?
So I just want to know one thing.
How do I turn off my brain? I mean, other than by changing my gender.