What am I worth? CWO IOW

I decided to participate this week in the CWO In Other Words because I was so drawn by the quote Christine of Fruit In Seasonhad chosen.

"Until you settle the issue of your own worth, it's impossible to bring holiness into anyone else's life. Until you understand that your worth is already determined by the fact of your birth, everything else is an exercise in propping up a dying tree."
~ Carol Brazo ~

"No Ordinary Home"

I guess I've always known in the back of my mind that I had a poor self esteem. I didn't like myself much. Growing up, I learned that I WANTED to do things that were wrong. I LIKED to drink, smoke, dance with boys, wear pants and other things that were sinful. You know, because that was the way I was taught.

So I must, therefore, by logical deduction, be a "Bad person" for enjoying things that were evil. I was not worthy of God; I was not worthy of my church; I was not worthy of my Family Name.

I don't know if you have ever heard about Theophostic ministries. My counselor and I use this approach and I am always amazed. Just amazed. One of the earlier visits she and I had centered around my belief that I was unworthy and ended by my asking myself "The Question"...Was this the truth? Or a Lie?

As I sat in the silence on that couch with tears rolling down my cheeks, I could feel the weight rising from my chest and the crying turned to laughter. Because I could see that message as the lie it was.

Because I am worthy! Not in and of myself, but covered by the blood of Jesus, I AM WORTHY. I am worth it, I am important...if for no other reason than the fact that I am an adopted child of God. If I believe I am unworthy, what does that say about Him who CHOSE me!

He loves me! No matter what! No matter who comes and goes in my life; no matter what kind of rotten parent others think I am; no matter how hard the struggle to keep a roof over our head and keep food on the table. No matter what an ungrateful child I am sometimes when I pitch a fit for having to go through the "hard stuff" of life ~ HE LOVES ME.

Therefore, I have worth. I am worth the life of God's son. His son was killed for me.

How much more important can someone get?

I am honored. I am humbled. It has taken a long time to get to this point. But I must say Ms. Brazo is right. Propping up a dying tree is only postponing the inevitable. Yet with my worth in the eyes of my Heavenly Father, I am new every day.

WOW!

Busy? Who's Busy?? CWO IOW

"Busyness is not a spiritual gift."
From an interview with
~ Lisa Harper ~

Christine has chosen a quote that really made me stop and pay attention.
Mainly because this poor girl is on strict bedrest and 8 months pregnant. She has been FORCED to sit down, don't move and watch the world go by. Which is hard to do when you are a mommy of three under age 6, a homeschooling mom and a music minister at your church.

WOW. I thought I had alot of irons in the fire.

I use my drive time to connect with God. Otherwise, I probably never would. I have to work on Sundays, so we don't usually go to church. And it seems when I am home, there is always something that needs to be done. I just have to prioritize and figure out what comes first. If the kids have been wearing the same pants to school for the last three days...then it would be LAUNDRY.

If I find myself having to eat my oatmeal with a wooden spoon because all the teaspoons are dirty...then the task of the day will be DISHES.

You know, important stuff like that.

But besides my drive time prayer sessions (my coworkers think I'm depressed or have "problems" at home because I often arrive at work with red eyes ;P) I can often multitask; dishes or laundry along with singing praises. Baking cookies along with talking to my kiddos about Christ's love and care.

Taking a second to "work" God into your daily schedule is WORTH the effort.

His Word is a Light - CWO IOW

"Ancient Words, ever true
Changing me and changing you
We have come with open hearts
O let the ancient words impart."

~ Lynn DeShazo~

Loni at Joy In The Morning chose the quote above from a song. I haven't heard the song, so I don't know how the tune goes. The words sound like an old hymn but Darlene says it's a contemporary hymn.
Either way, the words definitely mean something to me.

So many times in my life I have been without direction; at a crossroads or at an impasse, not knowing which way to turn. It is then that I turn to a gift given to me by a wonderful friend.

I call it my "Pink Bible". Cuz I have lots of Bibles...the black one, the brown one, the little black one with the gold family name on the front, the blue one, the sunrise one. You get the picture.

Anyway, God uses this book to speak to me. I'm not joking. All I do is say a quick prayer - "please show me, Father" and flip it open. Go to the next devotion and WHAMMO!

If it doesn't give me a direct answer, it will definitely give me something to think about.

And it has happened not just once or twice but more times than I can count, Ya'll! Needless to say, I keep this book in a safe place. It's actually kind of scary.

Think what you will; I may be crazy. But this Bible has seen me through career decisions, life threatening illnesses, abandonment and grief.

And I thank Him and praise Him for using His Word to give me His word on the subject.

"I was lost, but now, I'm found! Was blind, but now I see."
"Thy Word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path..."

Hindsight 20/20 - CWO IOW

"Every time you make a choice you are turning the central part of you, the part of you that chooses, into something a little different from what it was before... either into a creature that is in harmony with God, ...or into one that is in a state of war with God. Each of us at each moment is progressing to the one state or the other."

~ C.S. Lewis ~

Mere Christianity

This week, our hostess is Christine at Fruit In Season.

I had to read this one a couple of times before I "got it", you know? A by-product of being chronically exhausted, methinks. However, the little lightbulb DID come on. I think what Mr. Lewis is trying to say, to put it simply in a language of today, is that our choices either put us WITH God (in His will) or AGAINST God. Either way, that choice will change our spirit. It will either bring us closer to Him or take us farther away from Him.

WOW, could I tell you some stories!?!?

OK, I'll pick just one. Last year about this time, I told a male friend he could come stay with the kids and I. Sent him some money for the trip over from Ohio. Yah, I know. Don't say it.

Anyway, as soon as I gave him permission, I knew in my heart it was wrong. I felt torn up, scared, unsettled. Just WRONG! But I did not have the courage to call him back and say "No, I changed my mind." I let him just come on ahead. Every one said "OH NO! What have you DONE?!?" My guts said "OH NO! What have you DONE?!?"

Long story short, everyone was right. And so were my guts. VERY bad idea. Turned into a very bad situation. I prayed for God to bail me out. He didn't...but He did give me the courage to ask that "friend" to leave after about six weeks. But it was hard to do. A poor choice that hurt my kids and hurt my family and hurt me.

Yes, it changed me inside. In many ways. I have learned that in order to protect my family, I MUST listen to what He tells me to do. In order to be happy, I MUST listen. It made me realize what a self-destructive path I was on.

By God's grace, I'll remember those lessons for the rest of my life.

Mission field Podunk - CWO IOW

"It is insufficient to proclaim that the Church of God has a mission in the world. Rather, the God of mission has a Church in the world."

~ Tim Dearborn ~

Our hostess today is Laurel Wreath.

Missions. If you are like me, it's something you don't often think about.

But I thought about it ALOT as a child. As part of an Independent Baptist Church, we often had missionaries come speak. They made the circuit to raise supporters for their work. Our church would agree to send them a set amount each month.

And we had a "missions bulletin board" with a map of the world. They would send us letters, postcards and updates on their mission field. We would post them there and I remember staring in awe at that board; some of them would write to say the people in those countries had NEVER HEARD the Gospel.

WHAT? that was incomprehensible to me! NEVER heard of GOD?! I went to that church since before I was born. Literally. Everyone I knew had heard of God and Jesus; whether they believed or not was their choice. But to never know, never understand about something that was such a major part of my life? WOW.

As an adult, I discovered there are people right here in the old US of A that have a concept of God but do not KNOW Him at all. They have never heard the TRUTH of God nor the message of Jesus birth and death. Even if we can't travel to the jungles of Borneo or the plains of Africa to bring this knowledge to others, we can be missionaries RIGHT HERE at HOME. The person at your bus stop or the lady who lives next door may be your "mission field".

Ummm, here's the hard part, though. You knew there was a catch to this, huh?

How do we know who is a Child of God and who isn't? You can not tell by how someone lives. Some of the most noble, giving, honorable people I know are Pagans and Atheists. My heart breaks.

How do we know? There is only one way. Take a chance. Open our mouths and ask.

Scary, huh?!!

Sometimes, with children, it isn't hard. Cuz they do it for you. And you blush six shades of red when the six-year-old boy (who SWEARS he's going to be a pilot and a preacher when he grows up) says, "So, Do you know where you are going to spend eternity?"

My first thought is "I think I've been letting him hang around that Baptist Preacher too much!"

And my second thought is "Why, O Lord...Why not me? Why couldn't it have been me to ask?"

Because I was afraid. I'll admit it. I was afraid of ridicule. Afraid to lose my job. Afraid to get into some difficult theological discussion.

Forgive me, Father! Please Give me the courage to speak when I need to speak. Please give me the wisdom to know when someone needs only a hug and not words. Please help me to see the mission field in my own little ittybitty hometown, at the grocery store and gas station and at my quilting class. Open my eyes to the mission field; I am willing to do what you require.

WOW! It's ME to a "T"

While checking out others posts for the Christian Women Online weekly meme In Other Words, I happened upon this poem someone had posted in a comment section. I had never heard it before and as I read it, my eyes welled with tears.
For this is SO ME!
And I'm not EVEN joking!

As children bring their broken toys with tears for you to mend,
I brought my broken dreams to God, because He was my friend.
But then, instead of leaving Him in peace to work alone,
I hung around and tried to help, with ways that were my own.
At last, I snatched them back and cried, "How can you be so slow?"
"My child," He said, "what could I do? You never did let go."

Oh, WOW.

Change my heart, O God.
Make it ever true.
Change my heart, O God!
May I be like You.

You are the Potter... I am the clay.
Mold me and make me; this is what I pray!

It Ain't All a Bed of Roses! - CWO IOW

"One of the secrets to a happy marriage is remembering the source of our joy, which is not one another. The source of our joy is the Lord. Yes, we share tons of joyous moments, but we don't expect, let alone demand, endless joy-filled moments from each other. "
~ Liz Curtis Higgs ~
from the devotional: Rise and Shine

Darlene is our hostess for today's In Other Words quote.

I can't believe I skipped the last week or two. It just seems to have totally slipped my mind. But now I've made myself a handy little list over there on the right of weekday things I want to do, so that will help me remember.

It's also quite the co-incidence that MG and I were just talking about this very thing last night. Sometimes couples have this fantasy that they should never disagree about anything; that everything should remain calm. And if something does go wrong and they have a tough time communicating or working it out, then it's "over".

The reality is that we are human. We are going to disagree. MG and I are going to argue. It is hard to WORK at our relationship. It would be so easy to just walk away from him, to wrap my pride around me like a queens' cape and say "HE has to come groveling to ME. I'm not backing down"!

The key is in this fact...we both love God. And I love him. So I CHOOSE to stay and work things out. We BOTH come together; meet in the middle. Like God explains in His book, 1 Corinthians 13...

4. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

5. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. (I have a TOUGH time with this one. I get angry and say things I shouldn't...and I have the memory of an elephant! At least that's what my exhusband used to tell me when I would drag up everything he ever did since I met him during an argument.)

6. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

7. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. (that means, love chooses to "hang in there" and fight the fight; to work for the relationship!)

8. Love never fails...

As much as we wish it could be that way, relationships are not a bed of roses. Things are not always easy between partners.

It's ALL in how you handle it... WITH PRAYER and by doing what GOD wants you to, not what your human side wants you to do.

Listen up, Janean! I'm talking to you!

CWO IOW - cop out

It was a hard decision to make, but I decided not to participate in the CWO In Other Words meme this week. I can't think of anything intelligent to say about the quote chosen for this week.
However, I did want to point you in that direction! I'm positive some of the other ladies have come up with some fantastic views.
I don't know if she is the official hostess this week, but Laurel is always a good place to start!

Greater than I can ask or think ~ CWO IOW

"We are urgent about the body; He is about the soul. We call for present comforts; He considers our everlasting rest. And therefore when He sends not the very things we ask, He hears us by sending greater than we can ask or think."

~ Richard Cecil ~

Joy in the Morning is our hostess this week!

You know, this is the first time I have done this meme and actually discussed it with MG first. We were having lunch today and I told him about the quote. It was nice to be able to share our views on it together.

Now, I'll share with you.

I've always had a tough time with people who judge others before they get to know them. To me, that is the total antithesis of what God is all about (John 12:47). Jesus came to save sinners...and the Bible makes it clear that NO one is without sin (Isaiah 64:6) and NObody's sin is "better" than someone elses'(1 Timothy 1:15). A murderer who repents and comes to Him will be in Heaven just as surely as the CEO of a major company who commits his life to the Father. (John 8:6-8)

The world doesn't see it that way. The world says "SURELY, I am a better person than that 'druggie' over there", or "I am definitely a better than that drunk in the county jail".

And I won't tell you what family, friends and neighbors have told me they would like to do to my ex-husband for what he has done to our family. Upstanding, God-fearing, Christ-loving people have told me that they will never be able to forgive him. But God does. If he is truly repentant.

And if I judge THEM, then I am stooping to the same level. So suffice it to say that that is an issue that they will need to work out with God on their own. All I can do is pray for them and try to set an example with my own life.

I've also been a victim of discrimination several times in my life. People look at my outside and don't bother to get to know me as a person. Employers would check out my resume' or application for an office position and call me in for an interview. Then, when they saw I weighed 400 lbs, it was "Ummmm, we'll call you."

Yah, right.

People who would ignore me before suddenly decided they liked me when I weighed 200 instead of 400. And, to tell you the truth, I had to confess my anger and indignation to my Heavenly Father. Because I just wanted to yell at them ~ "HEY, if you didn't like me then, you CAN'T like me now!"

I worked in a packing plant as a teenager for several years and had seniority after three summers. Yet they would call in all available MALE employees before they would call me. My grandfather caught them at it one day and threatened to take his produce to a competitor...and furthermore, all his FRIENDS would, too! I was kind of embarrassed that my grampa fought my battle on that one...but I was only 15 and let me tell you what, it worked BIGTIME. The boss never delayed calling me again and I made some bucks that summer.

I am SO glad my Lord looks on my inside. I've got scars, tattoos, buck teeth...sometimes I say stupid things or bark at my kids.

HE knows my soul.

HE knows what I need...no matter what it is I ASK for.

When I'm thinking things aren't going according to "plan", I can trust that HE has a Master plan.

Oh, thank you, Lord! Thank you for loving me regardless.

Through A Child's Eyes - CWO IOW

"I long to worship Jesus with the heart of a child, in a state of pure and true adoration. Yet so many things of the world cloud my thoughts and pull on my heart until it's no longer just a girl in the arms of the Father"
~ Darlene Schacht ~
"The Mom Complex"

Our hostess this week is Iris at Sting My Heart.

It was so easy to see the wonder of God's Creations when my children were little. Now that they are growning up, I find that it takes a conscious effort to slow us down; to check out the "Oooo, WOW, look at that!" moments.

Sunrises, sunsets, babies, eskimo kisses, cheek-hugs, and seeing the special qualities in friends and family.

My dad is SO awesome when it comes to marveling daily at the Glory of God. As a child, I remember thinking that my dad was SO smart. He would point out different plants, grasses, animal tracks; amazing, wonderful things from a child's eyes. **GROSSNESS ALERT** We did alot of hunting and fishing so I got to experience firsthand knowledge of the insides of fish and animals. We dissected hearts, livers, gills and other glorious guts and body parts.

Now he does it with his 14 grandkids and they follow him everywhere. We call them "Grampa's Groupies." Grampa laces up his boots and suddenly children are running everywhere; gathering up their boots and coats and hollering "Gampa, Wait for MEEeeee!"

I learned SO much from him. And now I am able to pass it on to my kids. **ANOTHER GROSSNESS ALERT** Nothing says "family bonding" like watching a fish's heart beating outside it's body or checking out the little clear hard ball inside the fish's eye.

Yes, I did that. Ewwww!

Another part of this quote that touched my heart was the last phrase about being in the arms of the Father. I have had several quiet times with the Lord the last couple weeks where I have had the pleasure of mentally climbing up in Jesus lap and reliving the peace and joy of childhood.

I wrote about it Sunday in my Psalm post:

"Sometimes when I feel like life is getting to me, I visualize; I close my eyes and picture myself as a child sitting on His lap with my arms around Him, laying my head on his chest. It feels so good to be held, to see Him smile down at me. I don't have to worry about anything; I'm just His kid and He's taking care of me."

I can't express how awesome it feels. The temptation comes to not return to reality; to just keep my eyes closed and stay there in that place.

But the time comes when I must jump down, wave and say "I won't forget! I'll stay close by and I'll be back real soon!"

OK, now ya'll think I'm nuts. But that's how I relate to my Heavenly Father. It works for me.

It's also kind of a personal thing. I don't tell alot of "real life" people...maybe because of that reason; that they'll think I'm nuts. Don't know why I told you.

Maybe because I know you are my friends and you aren't out to judge me or make fun of me.

You don't laugh AT me...You laugh WITH me.

Right? !!

OK...stop laughing now.

:D

It's MY life ~ CWO IOW

"Satan's ultimate lie is that you are capable of being the god of your own life, and his ultimate bondage is getting you to live as though his lie is truth."
~ Neil Anderson ~

Christine at Fruit In Season is our hostess today.

It was such a conviction on my heart to read this quote. It's something I battle with constantly.

Like my pastor friend used to say..."You take the "garbage" out to the curb (giving something up to God) and then you go grab it back again before the garbage truck comes to haul it away."

I am getting better about it. Really, I am. But if Satan can get us to "forget" God and live like we can "handle it" ourselves, he's got us in a place where he can keep things lukewarm. If you're like me, it's not that we consciously REJECT God. Life just gets in the way. The business of living day to day and not making the effort and choice to turn to the Heavenly Father is more what I have a challenge with. I just get busy and "forget".

Till it all starts heading south.

And I realize I've slipped into a bad place. And I'm once again turning to God to bail me out of the muck I've gotten into...just by not paying attention.

That has been my prayer the last few months.

Father, CAUSE me to turn to You. Remind me. Whisper in my ear. Call me to Yourself. I WANT to be there. Don't let me forget.

And I try to surround myself with things that will jog my memory. I'm gettin' old, ya' know.

Like this meme. And the Psalm Sunday from Butterfly Kisses. And I've started turning off the radio on my daily commute to spend the time with God.

Just little things...little things to keep Satan at bay and keep me in line.

Cuz if you give me half a chance - I'm worse than a three-year-old!

Trust me! I know!

Can they tell? CWO IOW

"You act more like a Christian by your influence on the lost, then the saved people you impress"
~ Dr. Alvin Reid ~

Laurel Wreath is our hostess today.

I've heard it said that the word "Christian" means being "Christ-like" or emulating Jesus as closely as we possibly can. I can't validate that, because I haven't looked it up, but it seems right to me.

SO, if we look at Jesus walk on earth, what did He do?

Did He only go to church on Sundays or holidays and live like He wanted the rest of the week?

Did He refuse to worship with some because they didn't have the right kind of praise music?

Did He shy away from those who were "less reputable"? And, on the flip side, did He avoid and condemn the affluent?

No. Nope. Not. Nada at all! He was (and IS) equal opportunity for all. When He could be in church, He went. When He couldn't, He respected the day where He was. And I'm sure the music in a church meeting made no difference to Him. If they were honoring Him, what does it matter if they sang Gospel, Praise, Psalms or Tongues?

And that's how we learn about Christ. By how He lived. That's how we get to know Him. THAT is where we see the real testimony.

Sometimes I have shared with friends that often I feel "fake"...leading praise at church and singing out for Him, then getting in the car and yelling at my kids. THEY know. Mommy is not as "goody-two-shoes" as she seems.

OUCH!

So what is my witness to the world? How do I live my life? Walking the straight and narrow is easy when you are in God's house, surrounded by people "going the same way"...But when they have all gone their merry ways and I am alone? Can people who don't know Christ as their savior TELL from the way I act that I DO know Him and love Him with all my heart?

Can they tell?

Oh, I hope so.

CWO IOW - Words for the Wind

"Let us learn to discern whether the words spoken against us or against God or against the truth are merely for the wind--spoken not from the soul, but from the sore. If they are for the wind, let us wait in silence and not reprove. Restoring the soul, not reproving the sore, is the aim of our love"

~ John Piper from "A Godward Life"~

Our Hostess this week is Loni at Joy In The Morning.

I actually didn't think I would connect with Loni because of the title of her page...and ya'll know how I feel about mornings. :D

But when I started reading her blogs awhile back, I found that alot of what she had to say touched my heart. Even if I wasn't awake yet...

One thing about the quote she chose for today is that it reminded me of a post I saw this week at Christine's about 1 Peter 3:9; Trading blessing for insult.

So many times this week, I have caught myself wanting to snap back at MG or at someone else for saying something that "offended" me or something they said that I "took the wrong way". I don't WANT to react first and think later! Unfortunately, I usually do. Sure, it's human nature; but that doesn't make it right. The words we say often hurt more and wound deeper than any physical injury ever could.

Right now, I am having SUCH a struggle with this.

Another idea I had on this quote was regarding people who just need to talk about their problems (like me :D) and the listener feels the need to "fix" the problem. I can talk and talk (and write and write) and it's kind of like therapy, to me. Some people who listen to me don't understand that and it burdens them with my problems as well as their own. So, often, I come right out and TELL whomever I'm sharing with that I just need to talk and don't expect them to "come to the rescue".

The same is true with communication from others TO me. I sometimes feel responsible for their happiness, or I want to help SO badly that I take on their burdens.

Here's where 1 Peter 5:7 helps me..."Casting all my cares upon Him; for He cares for me" and Psalm 55:22 "Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; He will never let the righteous fall."

My prayer for this week is that the Father will help me hold my tongue until I realize that what I take offense to is said "for the wind" and let it go. Then I can show the Love of Jesus...instead of the Anger of Janean.

CWO IOW - Nail Scarred Hands

"Wherever you are spiritually, whatever you have been through emotionally, you are already wrapped in the Lord's embrace. Held close by nail-scarred hands."
~ Liz Curtis Higgs~
Sting My Heart is our hostess this week.

"Wherever I am spiritually..." Just where is that exactly? Not where I WANT to be, that's for sure! I do know He is calling to me. Everyday, He whispers to me to come to Him. Sadly, some days I stand up and say "Oh, no, Father. Today...Today, I can do this on my own. I'll holler if I need You."

What a rotten kid I am!

"Whatever I have been through emotionally..." Ummm, wow. Does the toilet count? I'm not bragging or whining here, but I wonder sometimes when others quote that verse about God not giving us more than we can handle...that maybe, JUST maybe, He has WAaaaay too high of an opinion of me!

Seriously, that verse goes on to say..."Not giving us more than we can handle WITH HIS HELP!" Therein lies the key. I would not have survived the last two years without Him. He has saved my life so many times! Every day He looks down on me and goes "WHOOOPS! Catch her! There she goes AGAIN! Toddling off into her own little world. What am I gonna DO with that child?!"

I can just hear it now.

And "Wrapped in the Lord's embrace...held in His nail-scarred Hands!"

I once heard a very wise pastor-friend say during a sermon that once we become a Child of God, we are held in His hands. Lovingly, carefully, safely.

The problem comes when we CHOOSE to JUMP OUT!

Ummm, Yah. That would be me. Big time. But I'm working on that. Could you add me onto the tail end of your prayer list? Please?

One final thought on this passage...When I close my eyes and visualize "nail-scarred hands" what comes to mind is so much more huge than that. (excuse the bad grammar). I know it was just a movie or a dramatization, but going to see "The Passion Of The Christ" had such a profound impact on me. It felt like I had witnessed a trainwreck. I was dumbfounded that people could just get up and walk out of the theater talking and laughing. My husband had to lead me out and I was staggering. I couldn't talk! Drove straight to my church, ran to the front and threw myself at the foot of the cross; crying and thanking Him for what He had done. The incredible pain and loss He suffered there FOR ME makes the trials of my life look like a flea bite. The broken body and broken heart of my Savior...Oh, Friends, those precious Hands were just the beginning.

CWO IOW - The Christmas Mindset

"Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind. To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas."
~ Calvin Coolidge ~
Former President of the United States

Our hostess this week is Darlene at God, Four Kids and a Dead Fish Named Sniff

As I have gone out on my "Search-and-destroy" shopping expeditions the last few days searching for just that one gift my four year old wants, I've noticed something.

There is NO peace, goodwill, or mercy ANYWHERE in Toys R Us during a holiday sale.

There is NO holiday state of mind in Walmart when the bottom shelves look like a bomb went off and merchandise is strewn over the floor at the end of the day.

Parents are close to coming to blows over toys that are in short supply. Harried workers try to avoid your eyes for fear you are going to ask them for that Dora The Explorer Talking Kitchen that disappears off the shelf as quickly as it arrives.

I've also noticed how quickly one person can turn that attitude around.

• Smile at everybody you meet!
• Help that mother with four little bitty ones reach that item on the top shelf.
• Hum Christmas Carols as you shop.
• Say "Merry Christmas!"..."Happy Holidays" over and over.
• Always drop your coin change into the Salvation Army bucket on the way out the door. Tell the ringer "thank YOU!"

It's AMAZING how fast ONE person can change the attitude of the entire store. Like one drop in the bucket ripples outward in ever-growing rings, the Christmas Spirit you share will touch others. I Promise! You might not see it, but it WILL happen.

And here's a couple of lessons I've learned in the last week.

Lesson #1...Don't let someone ELSE be the catalyst. As you can probably tell from the tone of my posting lately, I have had a big case of Seasonal Stress. So this morning when I went into Wally World for the 8th time this week to see if they had "new stock" in (I've tried calling...they will not answer the phone. I don't blame them, actually) I was NOT in a mood to be cheery. I RAN (ok...jogged) across the parking lot. Just wanted to GET THIS OVER WITH.

Then WHAMMO! Reality check. As I reached the door, an older man was blocking the entrance. He was having a very hard time walking and was leaning heavily on the cart. He couldn't quite get it up over the bump at the automatic doors. Near me was a woman and her young teenage son. Without even the slightest hesitation, this boy came up behind the elder man, took his elbow and said "can I help?"

I just wanted to give this kid a round of applause. I'm sure the angels were!!

And his act of kindness totally changed my heart. I finished my trip without scoring that one perfect gift...but I didn't quite mind so much. I left with a smile on my face and a slightly different feeling in my heart.

Next time, it'll be me that does the helping. Somehow, someway!

Lesson #2 - If you want an exercise in patience, give that change to go into the Salvation Army bucket to a four year old.

Coming out of the store, the person ringing the bell asks if my four-year-old can have a candy cane. I can't tell if it was a woman or a man because the person was bundled VERY well, but I suspect it was a woman.

And I said SURE!

So while she's digging under the layers of coats and sweaters and scarves with her gloves, I dig out my spare change. And hand it to little one.

And THEN I WAIT WHILE SHE FEEDS EVERY COIN INTO THE SLOT ONE BY ONE!

And WAIT...

And WAIT...

And JUST WHEN I think, "Oh goody! She's done! I'm freezing out here!!"....

Dear sweet MG empties his pocket and hands her his change as well.

Ummmm...Helloooo! I want to LEAVE! STRESS and IMPATIENCE written all over Mommy's face here.

Then I look around and notice other people. The bell-ringing lady with the smile on her face. The older couple stopped holding packages in one hand and stifling a giggle with the other. MG watching me and grinning like a Cheshire cat.

Sometimes it takes me a little while, but I think I'm catching on.

Just think...next week at this time, Christmas will be OVER. Weird, huh?

Happy Holidays!

CWO IOW - The keys to my home

"I am the one holding the keys to the atmosphere in our home."
~ Terry Maxwell ~
Author of: Homeschooling with a Meek and Quiet Spirit

Christine at http://fruitinseason.blogspot.com/ is our hostess for CWO In Other Words... today.

When I saw this post Friday and began my meditation on what to write, I felt differently than I do today.

Friday, I thought "WOW! In the past, that has certainly been the truth!"

And, OH BOY, have I messed it up. Big time. God, please forgive me!

Five years ago, I was in a bad relationship. My children and I had to walk on eggshells to keep the peace. So I rode them. HARD. "Oh my goodness, Daddy's coming home! QUICK, get that stuff up off the floor so he doesn't yell. Now everyone stay out of his way!"

Needless to say, my children were little balls of stress. And I was the big ball that led them all.

Year and a half ago, that ended. As I staggered and wandered in the aftermath, my children's therapist advised me that they were trying to shelter ME, to care for ME, to make sure I wasn't hurting. What kind of an example is that, I ask you? I should be the responsible one! Yet many times, I lead them astray with my actions.

I have fallen on my face before my Heavenly Father over this more times than you can imagine. And even though you may not agree, I also have admitted to my children the mistakes I have made and asked their forgiveness for not being the Mother/Father/Parent I should have been.

Today, I am saddened.

For now that I am "getting it together", back on my feet mentally, spiritually and somewhat physically, I find that someone else is raising my children.

For I have had to go to work fulltime to attempt to support us all.

Which means of the 60 hours a week that they are not in school and awake, I am only with them 28 of those hours.

28 hours a week. That just doesn't seem right.

They are with a daycare provider 250 hours a month.

So the truth is that other people are raising my children.

They are starting to beg for time with me. I hope to be able to catch some time with them the next few weeks while they are home from school for Holiday break. Made a "date" with my 7 year old next week to spend a couple hours with her Christmas shopping at the dollar store before I go to work.

I know there are mommys all over the world who are working TWO jobs to support their kids. So why am I complaining? Shouldn't I just be happy I HAVE a job?

So why does it break my heart that I have to "SCHEDULE" time with my children.

I'm wondering, actually. I wonder...DO I set the atmosphere of my home?

I don't think so. I think I'm a passing breeze; a visitor. Someone who comes in and kisses them in the middle of the night and hugs them goodbye in the morning.

How does one create an "atmosphere" in a situation like this?

I wonder...

IOW 12/5 My life preserver

"One response was given by the innkeeper when Mary and Joseph wanted to find a room where the Child could be born. The innkeeper was not hostile; he was not opposed to them, but his inn was crowded; his hands were full; his mind was preoccupied. This is the answer that millions are giving today. Like a Bethlehem innkeeper, they cannot find room for Christ. All the accommodations in their hearts are already taken up by other crowding interests. Their response is not atheism. It is not defiance. It is preoccupation and the feeling of being able to get on reasonably well without Christianity."~ Billy Graham ~

Laurel Wreath is hosting "In Other Words" this week. http://lrlwreath.blogspot.com/ **She has a GREAT sugar cookie recipe on there, too!

As I sat and pondered this quote, it lead me down a little rabbit trail. The message that struck me from it was one that will probably not seem related at first. But it's one that is close to my heart.

I often call myself on the carpet (so to speak) about only running to Christ in times of need. The challenge of living WITH Him day-to-day is my current personal battle. I tend to shuffle my King to the back of my mind unless I find myself running low on gas, low on money or low on self-confidence. I find that I use God as a Life preserver rather than a seat cushion.

Weird analogy, I know...but that's me. What I mean is, that when I'm drowning I holler out "Oh Lord, HELP ME NOW!" rather than thinking of Him often during the day as I would my favorite seat cushion; whenever you sit down, saying "Thank you, God, for being their whether I need you or not."

Like one of my best buddies, for instance. Sometimes I feel like my relationship right now, with her, is running along these same lines. It seems whenever I call her, it's because I want something. I need to borrow her sewing machine, could she pick up my mail, or could her daughter babysit? So I try to make a conscious effort to call her "just because"; let her know I miss her and I value her.

The same should be of my relationship with my Heavenly Father. Sometimes I should go to Him "Just Because" and listen to what He has to say or just bask in His love for a moment instead of saying "I Want, I Want, I Want!" or "Please Help me!"

My prayer is that I will RECOGNIZE His work; Pay attention to what He's doing and never take my relationship with Him for granted.

In "Other" Words - Tuesday 11/28

This week's quote to ponder is...

"God has delivered us, He has parted waters for us, He has made water gush forth from rocks and sent us our own manna from heaven. He has brought us into our own Promised Land. Will I miss the opportunity to tell the story to our children?"
~ Ann Voskamp, Holy Experience ~

OH! I hope I don't miss the opportunity to tell the stories to my children.

"Dear Heavenly Father;

Please, Lord, I beg before You now; keep me thankful for Your gifts. I NEVER want to become so dependent on You that I just EXPECT You to provide for me, yet I always want to have the FAITH that You can and You will.

Remind me to continue to sing the "God is so good" chorus with my children when we are blessed with unexpected finances.

Break my heart to the point of tears when I come home and find an "angel" has left groceries on my doorstep.

You are AMAZING beyond words, My Father, and I want to always hold that awe for your blessings as a light before my children so they, too, may grow to depend on You with thankfulness.

In Your Precious Son's Name..."